Monday, March 8, 2010

A Proverbs 31 Man and Deuteronomy

Taken from "The Most Important Year in a Man's Life/ The Most Important Year in a Woman's Life" by Robert and Bobbie Wolgemuth, and Mark and Susan DeVries.

This was quite a wonderful book. I found it on half.com after i had ordered a marriage book which i have yet to read. This one was on the list of suggestions from the ever-so-wise ebay people. I guess they assume that they know what i want to read before i do. This one was a God-send, though. I really learned a lot from it.

The book is written by two Christian couples and I believe one of the husbands is a pastor. The book is split in half, with one side being for the women, and the other for the man. But they highly encourage either sex to read both sides. So of course i did:) And i am giving it to my future husband, who is very eager to read it as well.

Here's some snippets and thoughts...

Deuteronomy 24:5 states, "If a man has recently married, he must not be sent to war or have any other duty laid on him. For one year he is to be free to stay at home and bring happiness to the wife he has married."

Did you hear that? An entire year focused solely on getting to know your spouse. If this was a command, how much importance do you think God placed on new marriages? This first yr. is called in the book the "Wet Cement Year". Once the pattern is set in the first year, change can take place, "but it may take something like a jackhammer to bring it about".

The wife of the Proverbs 31 man immediately gains self-esteem from the sterling reputation of her husband. "[Her husband] praises her" (31:28). Few things are more motivating to a woman than words of sincere admiration coming from her husband. The Proverbs 31 man is liberal with these expressions.

On learning to please your spouse: 
Okay, so these things don't come naturally. Did learning to ride a bicycle come naturally, or did u have to work at it? How about swimming? Or learning to read? ...Did these things come naturally or did you learn them? And what did it take for these to become skills? That's easy to answer. You wanted to master them-- and so you did.
Marriage is work. But so is everything, if you want to be good at it. For some reason I had never thought about it like that before...
And that's just the tip of the iceberg on what i have been learning, I am sure I will be referencing this book in the weeks and months to come...

Find a way to please your man today, first figuring out what he is most pleased by, not necessarily by what YOU think pleases him...

1 comment:

Erin said...

I' glad you're taking the time to learn these things now - it will be so helpful for you later on! I especially recommend finding things that please Dan and just making them a regular part of your routine and behavior so that they just become 2nd nature. You can ask him, but also pay attention to things he says or does - the fact that you make an effort will mean a lot to him and encourage him in HIS role, too!